You can be who you want to be, don't let set backs early in life hold you back
So, I have no friends.
Not just that, I don't socialise either. I don't go out - I don't want to be that guy who is chatting to people like a crazy person. But I'm okay with that.
The reason is simple. When you are young and are at nursery or school, you are effectively trapped with the same people for X amount of years. So you kind of have to socialise with them because if you don't then you will be lonely like me. So you can socialise as little as you need to get you through it, but then after you finish school you don't need to speak to them ever again. I don't anymore and I shouldn't feel bad about it. Because I didn't fit in with that group of people and still don't. So why should I try if it just constantly gets me down?
At university it is far easier, you can chat and socialise with people you actually have things in common with, this is true for the various clubs etc. You don't have to get on with everyone because you are only human and if you try to get on with everyone you will struggle. I joined some clubs and only socialised with people I got on with, I did talk with some people who I didn't get on with, but we didn't carry on talking, so clearly it was mutual. This is what I actually do like, being able to both admit that you don't get on, I don't hate them - we just didn't get on and that's fine.
So as an adult you can see and socialise with who you want which is great news! Yet I'm still lonely. This is surprisingly common and a real issue with today's generation sadly. I had quite a few friends at university, but they all live in other countries now and it doesn't match my social need. I am doing things to try to fix this, but it can take years to build up a good friendship and if that is what is needed then I will do my best to work on that.
I guess I'm quite down at the moment, but things can turn around quickly, and as an adult if you don't want to see someone or socialise with them then you don't have to. This is because you aren't stuck with them as much, you can get around and see other people and do other things. Whereas in school you are stuck with them for 9 hours a day etc. So yes school can be a very difficult time, but after that you can be who you want to be.
I know that this seems stupid to write and people always say it, and I know people will ignore it, but just keep on doing you and things will figure themselves out in the end.
Not just that, I don't socialise either. I don't go out - I don't want to be that guy who is chatting to people like a crazy person. But I'm okay with that.
The reason is simple. When you are young and are at nursery or school, you are effectively trapped with the same people for X amount of years. So you kind of have to socialise with them because if you don't then you will be lonely like me. So you can socialise as little as you need to get you through it, but then after you finish school you don't need to speak to them ever again. I don't anymore and I shouldn't feel bad about it. Because I didn't fit in with that group of people and still don't. So why should I try if it just constantly gets me down?
At university it is far easier, you can chat and socialise with people you actually have things in common with, this is true for the various clubs etc. You don't have to get on with everyone because you are only human and if you try to get on with everyone you will struggle. I joined some clubs and only socialised with people I got on with, I did talk with some people who I didn't get on with, but we didn't carry on talking, so clearly it was mutual. This is what I actually do like, being able to both admit that you don't get on, I don't hate them - we just didn't get on and that's fine.
So as an adult you can see and socialise with who you want which is great news! Yet I'm still lonely. This is surprisingly common and a real issue with today's generation sadly. I had quite a few friends at university, but they all live in other countries now and it doesn't match my social need. I am doing things to try to fix this, but it can take years to build up a good friendship and if that is what is needed then I will do my best to work on that.
I guess I'm quite down at the moment, but things can turn around quickly, and as an adult if you don't want to see someone or socialise with them then you don't have to. This is because you aren't stuck with them as much, you can get around and see other people and do other things. Whereas in school you are stuck with them for 9 hours a day etc. So yes school can be a very difficult time, but after that you can be who you want to be.
I know that this seems stupid to write and people always say it, and I know people will ignore it, but just keep on doing you and things will figure themselves out in the end.
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